


No Regrets

by ashisfriendly



Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Breaking Up & Making Up, F/M, Regret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-01
Updated: 2013-09-01
Packaged: 2017-12-25 06:21:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/949691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashisfriendly/pseuds/ashisfriendly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ann and Chris dig up the past while working on the future.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Regrets

Ann pulled her hair out of her face and quickly snapped a band around her locks, placing a messy bun on the top of her head. She checked her cheeks for the usual new spots or lines that she hadn’t noticed before and smoothed her hands over her face, satisfied when she found nothing she hadn’t seen before. Her mirror started to fog and when she looked at the shower, bellows of steam were floating over the top of her polka dot shower curtain. She smiled, and pulled back the curtain and stepped into the hot water.

As she washed her body, she stopped at her belly. It lay flat under her palm and she rubbed her skin in circles, slick and warm from the shower. Every shower she did this, this weird nurturing of her stomach that would hopefully result in a baby. Maybe if she started taking care of her tummy like she would eventually care for her child, it would respond appropriately. She also pressured Chris to show her how to do that head stand yoga pose so she could do it after sex. He was very excited to show her and he had started doing them with her. The first time they fell over giggling because of how ridiculous it was to be doing them naked, two seconds after climax.

A knock on the door startled Ann and she gave a small yelp.

“Ann Perkins!”

Her heart slowed at the sound of Chris’s voice. She loved the way he greeted her, as if he was meeting her for the first time over and over again. Chris kept things new and fresh, even if their relationship was cut in half, pieced back together, and started again.

“Hi honey!” Ann yelled. She heard the door knob twist but stick.

“I called, sorry to startle you,” he started, “I was going to come in there, but you locked me out.” Chris’s voice was muffled but she could hear the playful disappointment.

She rinsed her face and rubbed her eyes. “I’ll be right out.”

Ann turned in the shower, making sure to rinse off the rest of her body. She used a new body wash every shower, as Leslie had given her enough to last a lifetime. Today’s body wash was tangerine. She turned the knob and stepped out, smoothing a towel over her skin. She pulled on a pair of yoga pants and a tank top and opened the door.

The cold air hit her skin and she took a big breath of the dry air. Ann pulled the bun loose and her hair fell down to her shoulders. She shook her head and wrapped the tie around her wrist. She stepped out into the living room and didn’t find Chris. She looked in the spare room and he wasn’t there either.

“Chris?”

She paused, waiting for a response but one never came. Ann walked back to the living room and entered the kitchen and out the back door. In the middle of the grass was Chris, doing sit ups.

“Are you okay?”

Chris stopped long enough to answer. “I’m a little sad.”

Ann frowned and walked off the porch. The grass was dry from the summer sun. She should get a sprinkler system. She walked up to Chris and expected him to stop but he just moved faster. She sat down and crossed her legs, placing her hand on his knee. He slowed but didn’t stop.

She learned that when Chris was sad, no matter what, he needed to do something physical. At the end of sad movies, he would do a few jumping jacks before snuggling into Ann, or when he was bummed out about firing some one, he would jog a quick mile and then make a smoothie. Ann was just there to cheer him on, to be there when he was ready for a hug or comfort. She was fine with it, in all honesty, Chris was the first man she met who knew how to control and deal with his emotions. It might have been a bumpy road to get there, but he did it.

So she sat and kept her hand on his knee, squeezing. Chris whispered “100” and stopped, laying back on the grass, his arms out to his sides. Ann watched his chest expand and flatten as he caught his breath. Her hand snuck down his leg and over his stomach, to his chest. He felt stiff under her, not like the relaxed man who was usually under her fingers.

“What’s wrong?” Ann asked.

Chris closed his eyes. “I saw your phone.”

Ann tilted her head. That shouldn’t mean anything, she had nothing on there that could upset him.

“Okay, what did you see?”

Chris sat up and turned to his side. He grabbed something from the ground and turned back to her. It was her phone. He unlocked it and clicked to her call log. There, in red, was a missed call from Regret.

“You have me in your phone as Regret. I checked.” Chris clicked through to the contact, his own face smiling at him next to his new name.

She remembered doing that. Ann and Leslie were at The Bulge and Ann drank way too many Leslie-tinis (“Because you’ll never dump me, Lesssslie!”). She danced with a lot of chiseled gay men and giggled with Leslie at how cute they all were, then complained about how gay they were. Ann, then, opened her phone and edited Chris’s contact, giving him the name Regret. She hadn’t changed it when Chris came back and became her friend, she didn’t change it when he became the future father of her children, and she hadn’t changed it when he became more than both of those things.

How had she not changed it? She had been sexting a man named Regret, calling him, making dates with him. She just didn’t pay much attention to it. It wasn’t even a word she read in her head or said out loud, it just blinked on her screen and meant Chris. It was like a symbol, which made everything worse. And now he had seen it.

“Is there something you want to tell me?” Chris asked. His eyes were sad but on her.

“Chris, this is from before...”

Before was a time they didn’t really talk about. When their relationship was rushed, both going in and coming out. When Chris didn’t give Ann the thought of his future because he was on the road and he knew how to have a relationship with a built in timeline. When Ann was so out of it and unlike herself she couldn’t even realize he was dumping her.

“But you haven’t changed it?” he asked, even though his answer was still in his hand.

“I just forgot,” she pleaded.

“We’ve been dating for months, Ann.” Her heart twisted at the sound of just her first name. Chris greeted her with both names, said his hopeful optimism for next month with three names, and lovingly called her babe or honey in whispers above her. Just Ann was resolved for this, for sadness and anger.

Ann knew he was emotionally delicate and easily saddened but this seemed extreme even for him, this wasn’t a big deal, she just hadn’t changed his name in her phone.

“And we’ve been friends even longer,” he whispered, lowering his head, finally letting his eyes drift somewhere else but on her.

“Chris, come on, you used to ask me advice, me, your ex girlfriend, about your current relationships. You told me you had sex with other women! Practically bragging.” Ann stood up and widened her stance. They never talked about the past, but now that it came up, it seemed like a good time to drudge up everything. “You broke up with me, I didn’t even know you did, and then paraded around when you got back with other women as if we never dated. You can’t do that!”

Sure, she was being crazy and unfair and maybe overreacting, but she had been holding this in for over a year. He can pout and be sad about his name in her contact list, she can bring old issues to the surface.

Chris quickly stood up. “You were my friend.”

“I was your ex, Chris.”

“But--”

“No, I had the right to be upset about that. You never asked me how I felt about you being back in Pawnee, how I felt about you dating other women, instead you shoved it in my face.” Ann crossed her arms. “I always liked you.”

Chris reached for her but she pulled away. “I didn’t know.”

“You never asked, and in some sick and twisted way I was just thankful we were speaking.”

“Do you regret dating me?” He took a step closer to her and Ann didn’t move.

Did she? What she told Chris was true, she had always liked him. She kissed him because he was handsome and always smiled. She dated him because he was kind and thoughtful. She liked him from afar because while she admired him, liked him for everything he was, he still hurt her and he wasn’t with her anymore, and he made that very apparent. Now he was hers, giving her fertility tea every night and crossing his fingers in pictures he texted her on the days where she was hoping her period wouldn’t start. She was dating a guy who jumped in head first into a relationship, knowing full well there was a baby in their future. And he stuck around, gave more than he had to, and was her loving boyfriend.

“No.”

Chris softened and a small smile crept to his lips but never reached his eyes. “Ann Perkins.” Sometimes she thought her name was only meant to come from his mouth. “I’m so sorry for putting you through that. I get so excited, so revved up in my own life and my own struggles, I don’t see the ones around me.” He reached for her and she let him place his hand on her neck and pull her closer.

“You’re getting better.” Ann mumbled into his chest, wrapping her arms around his middle. “Can I be mad at you for awhile longer?” His arms felt good around her but her face still felt hot and the feelings lingered. She remembered trying to date other guys, only to be disappointed they weren’t Chris. She remembered lamenting to Leslie about Shauna’s long legs, and watching Ghost over and over just to have a better reason to cry than over her ex boyfriend.

Chris laughed and the way it shook in his body made her smile. Damnit.

“Sure. And I’m going to be sad until you change my name in your phone.”

“Deal.”

Chris kissed her head and Ann pushed on his chest, walking into the kitchen. She made a batch of pancakes and called Leslie to complain. Leslie came over and they ate pancakes while Chris ran a few miles. When he returned, Leslie was gone and Ann tossed her phone to Chris.

He flicked through her phone, wiping the sweat off his forehead. She watched his face soften and then stretch into a wide smile. He put the phone on the coffee table and crawled over her body.

“Ann Meredith Perkins.”

And then he kissed her. 


End file.
